I think I baked just about every flavour of pie there is on this planet by being the model housewife. The best pie does not involve an oven though. The recipe includes a dashing lad's dipstick, a bed-- though not necessarily, and my aching cunt.

Dae ye fancy orders? I fancy being in control and taking charge in wanking chariot. I can drive and ride ye till ye cum or make noises. My touch can be stimulating and relaxing. Just finding the man who can be a true pleaser.

I work hard but play harder. I relish being outdoors, particularly throughout the summertime. Even winter can't make me stay at home. I love food, good company and loud laughter, while downing tequila.

I want to escape the real world, and go to a different world where flirting and having sex is not seen as immoral. I'd be chuffed if a bloke can lick my arse any time or if he can drink from my strawberry creams.

I am always for the search of new experiences and adventures. Chatting is the new adventure for me right now. I would enjoy someone who can keep my fanny dripping wet while we are chatting on the phone. If you think this is you, then chat me up!

I'm that lady who's not shy to show her naughtiness when she's alone with a good-looking chap. As a woman of no shame, I immediately get down on my knees when I see a penis waiting for my sensual tongue.